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Wednesday

Two Fashion No's to Know Now

By: Emily Timm

Hello friends. I'm going to make this short, mostly because I hope that all of you know this by now. I was at Desert Ridge Marketplace the other day with some friends and I saw two people, one after the other, violating some of the most simple and important fashion rules.

First I saw a woman wearing a jumpsuit. Jumpsuits are sort of cute, and they were really in style three years ago. But they're not in style now. I know some of you spent quite a lot of money on your pink, Juicy, velvet jumpsuits and you're not ready to let them go; so wear it to the gym or around the house, but please not otherwise. And I know that they are still selling them…don't buy one. Also, this woman was not wearing a shirt underneath her undersized, jumper zip up. Not only was she boldly bearing her cleavage, but she was also bearing her belly. If you're looking for a first-class loser to pick you up, please, keep to this look. However, if you're looking for a classier fellow to notice you, put on some clothes that fit you and leave men wondering what's underneath them.

After grimacing at this sad woman, I was surprised to be immediately faced with another fashion disaster. She was wearing cheap, white jeans (and I say "cheap" in the least snotty way possible, you'll understand further in a second). But that's not the worst part; they were tight—as in way too tight. I almost went up to her, put my hand on her shoulder, and said, "Huni, you're better than that". But I didn't. Friends, you can only wear white jeans, pants, skirts, capris, etc. in the Spring and during the Summer. In Arizona it's hard to follow the Memorial Day and Labor Day rules because our weather isn't as consistent. So go by these guidelines: in the Spring when you don't have to wear a jacket at 6am or 8pm, go for the white (appx. April 1). In the Fall, when it starts getting chilly (apprx. September 20), put the white in the back of your closet. Lastly, I know we all love to buy style cheap, but do not go cheap when buying white bottoms. Believe me, with all the things that could go wrong with white, it's worth it to cash out the money at Nordstroms for that fantastic pair of white jeans or mini skirt. One more small tip—if you're in between sizes, go for the bigger size (trust me).

I guess my advice wasn't so short after all. ;) Fashion really gets me going! See you all soon.